Why oh why?

Why do I look so mad?

In 2001 I had a kidney transplant and ever since then I've been taking all these anti-rejection medicines.

In the last year or so I have been very depressed and miserable, I always look like I'm mad or something and deep inside myself I am mad and upset and I don't know why.
I've read up on depression and transplants and there seem to be a lot of people that get depressed a few years after they've had their transplant and some are saying it's related to some of the meds that we take, I wonder if that's right?

Look at the picture and how mad I look and this should be a happy day for me because I just got this great gift from my beautiful wife and my mother-in-law, and yes it's a computer.
It's a top of the line computer and I should know computers being that I've been in IT for the last 20 years.
It just saddens me so much to think that I am hurting my wife with this depression thing and everything.

What am I to do? I've already talked about this to my transplant doctors and they recommend me going to a psychologist and that's not something I really want to do.
This is probably paranoia and everything but since moving to the US (from Canada) I don't really trust the medical establishment and insurance companies here and I'm afraid having a psychologist in my medical records will be trouble even if my depression is caused by some of my anti-rejection medications.

What to do?

Laura (my wife) does want me to go and see someone but I don't know.
I just wish I could be happy again.